100% proven zodiac analyses

  • aries: short-tempered kind-hearted babies
  • taurus: stubborn knucklehead cuties who are nice to everyone
  • gemini: intelligent blabber-mouths w a great sense of humor
  • cancer: over-emotional compassionate lil cupcakes
  • leo: melodramatic fun-loving fucks
  • virgo: creative whiny pissbabies who are intellectually stimulating
  • libra: ditsy carefree pacifist qts
  • scorpio: intensely emotional secretive bad bitches
  • sagittarius: honest philosophical travel-agents who don't give a fuck
  • capricorn: organized self-driven sarcastic dickheads
  • aquarius: extroverted detached open-minded freaks
  • pisces: sensitive lazyasses who are ideological + creatively stimulating

thefingerfuckingfemalefury:

gallifrey-feels:

More fun facts about ancient Celtic marriage laws: There were no laws against interclass or interracial marriage, no laws against open homosexual relationships (although they weren’t considered ‘marriages’ since the definition of a marriage was ‘couple with child’), no requirement for women to take their husband’s names or give up their property, but comedians couldn’t get married

It’s Adam and Eve not Adam Sandler and Eve

(via thesirensaresingingyourname)

divawithanunspoiledagenda:

nerdnuggets:

jelliclephantomfaces:

chandraleeschwartz:

six-months-from-never:

*sees broom*

*picks up broom*

"TELL THEM HOW I AM DEFYYYYYYYYYING GRAAAAAVITTYYYY"

*starts sweeping broom sadly*

"There is a castle on a cloud…"

*holds broom horizontally*

"Never need a reason, never need a rhyme. Up on the roof top step in time!"

*sweeps broom angrily*

"IT’S A HARD KNOCK LIFE!"

*begins waltzing with broom* I could have DAAAAANCED all NIIIIIGHT

(via dontbeanassbutt)

scarecrowinc93:

garymanderrr:

chapmen:

literally wtf the fuck

i love how the balloon one is just like ????

what kind of black magic is this family

(via congalineofdurin)

ladygagarbage:

I’LL NEVER GO THROUGH THE FRAN DESCHER TAG AGAIN 

ladygagarbage:

I’LL NEVER GO THROUGH THE FRAN DESCHER TAG AGAIN 

(via thesirensaresingingyourname)

fuc-kkk:

kadabralin:

fierceawakening:

art-vandelay-xvx:

and-the-devil-makes-three:

beardenvy:

queeniman:

lulz-time:

BREAKING: Seattle becomes the first city to raise its minimum wage to $15/hour. SHARE if Congress should take Seattle’s lead! 
the current minimum wage (at least in NY) is $8.00 and less than a year ago it was $7.25, so yes.

Wow

Nope nope and nope. Make better decisions and life and you won’t be working a minimum wage job.

^ That’s literally the dumbest fucking thing I’ve ever read in my life. Are you the kind of person that goes up to homeless people and tells them to get a job? Good fuuuuuuuuuuuucking lord. If everyone was able to get a “better” job, there would be absolutely no-one populating the mass expanse of the workforce. Are you unable to see how this suggestion is completely and utterly illogical? And extremely rude?
Thank god people in Seattle have good heads on their shoulders so single mothers working 3 minimum wage jobs to feed their children can finally be treated like actual live human beings with needs and not capitalistic automatons. 

"Just get a better job" is the most white bread privilege shit I’ve ever heard.

I don’t even think it’s white privilege. I think it’s just near-bottomless dumbfuckery.

"Get a better job," they said.
Suddenly, every custodian everywhere quits their job and gets a better one. Now, upon entering public restrooms, everyone is handed a spray bottle and toilet brush, because now they have to scrub their own shit out of that public porcelain throne. Women’s restrooms come complete with plastic bags, because they have to bring their soiled period products home with them and dispose of them at home, because there is no more public waste removal.
"Get a better job," they said.
All fast food employees quit and find a “better job”. No more fast food places! There also aren’t any restaurants. Better learn to cook your own shitty garbage burgers. You have only yourself to yell at if you forget the cheese.
"Get a better job," they said.
Retail stores no longer have any employees. All shopping must be done online, but you have to drive out and pick up the supplies yourself because the Fedex people quit and got better jobs, too.
"Just get a better job," they said!
You now have to grow and make every single thing you ever consume for the rest of your life, because no one wants to do it for you at $7 an hour.
Fuck you.

^ THE LAST COMMENT THOUGH FUCKIN AMEN

fuc-kkk:

kadabralin:

fierceawakening:

art-vandelay-xvx:

and-the-devil-makes-three:

beardenvy:

queeniman:

lulz-time:

BREAKING: Seattle becomes the first city to raise its minimum wage to $15/hour. SHARE if Congress should take Seattle’s lead! 

the current minimum wage (at least in NY) is $8.00 and less than a year ago it was $7.25, so yes.

Wow

Nope nope and nope. Make better decisions and life and you won’t be working a minimum wage job.

^ That’s literally the dumbest fucking thing I’ve ever read in my life. Are you the kind of person that goes up to homeless people and tells them to get a job? Good fuuuuuuuuuuuucking lord. If everyone was able to get a “better” job, there would be absolutely no-one populating the mass expanse of the workforce. Are you unable to see how this suggestion is completely and utterly illogical? And extremely rude?

Thank god people in Seattle have good heads on their shoulders so single mothers working 3 minimum wage jobs to feed their children can finally be treated like actual live human beings with needs and not capitalistic automatons. 

"Just get a better job" is the most white bread privilege shit I’ve ever heard.

I don’t even think it’s white privilege. I think it’s just near-bottomless dumbfuckery.

"Get a better job," they said.

Suddenly, every custodian everywhere quits their job and gets a better one. Now, upon entering public restrooms, everyone is handed a spray bottle and toilet brush, because now they have to scrub their own shit out of that public porcelain throne. Women’s restrooms come complete with plastic bags, because they have to bring their soiled period products home with them and dispose of them at home, because there is no more public waste removal.

"Get a better job," they said.

All fast food employees quit and find a “better job”. No more fast food places! There also aren’t any restaurants. Better learn to cook your own shitty garbage burgers. You have only yourself to yell at if you forget the cheese.

"Get a better job," they said.

Retail stores no longer have any employees. All shopping must be done online, but you have to drive out and pick up the supplies yourself because the Fedex people quit and got better jobs, too.

"Just get a better job," they said!

You now have to grow and make every single thing you ever consume for the rest of your life, because no one wants to do it for you at $7 an hour.

Fuck you.

^ THE LAST COMMENT THOUGH FUCKIN AMEN

(via kar-kat-dennings)

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